February 1, 2011 - Healthcare Reform Feels the Heat in Florida

health care reform thrown out in fl
Really Short Story: Florida says you can't force people to buy health insurance. Don't worry, you can still buy as many semi-automatic weapons as you want. Although, that means you may want to get that health insurance as well.

the OTHER big news:
troy polamalu defensive player of the year - What could possibly top being named NFL Defensive Player of the Year? Oh yeah, maybe winning the Pro Bowl? Or the Super Bowl, I guess.
charlie sheens rehab program - Charlie Sheen is getting his own personal rehab…it turns out not too most people in rehab are there for something other than constantly being surrounded by cocaine and prostitutes.
australia cyclone - I know a few inches of snow is all you can think about right now, but down under, the people of Australia got some more severe weather issues…
us egypt soccer match cancelled - Apparently, some people think Egypt is unsafe to travel to right now…including the people who actually live there.
rick james
February 1, 2011: rick james Day! - I'm James Ambrose Johnson, Jr., b*$%h!
WHY?: His full name is James Ambrose Johnson, Jr., which might explain why he changed his stage name to something more appealing, but doesn't really explain how he chose Rick James as that something. If you know of Rick James, it is probably for one of several reasons. First, you may legitimately enjoy his entire catalogue of music, from "You and I" to "Cold Blooded" to "Give It To Me Baby" to "Mary Jane." Maybe you've heard his hit song "Super Freak" used in a movie like Little Miss Sunshine. Or perhaps you've seen Dave Chappelle's masterful impersonation from a few years back. Of course, on a sadder note, you may have heard of James' insane drug-fueled lifestyle which ultimately lead to numerous health problems and his death in 2004.

TOMORROW'S contenders:
shakira - This diminutive pop star is Colombia's finest legal import.
christie brinkley - One of the original supermodels, also mistakenly (I assume) married Billy Joel for a few years.
farrah fawcett - I think she was a blond bombshell from back in the days when people used terms like "blond bombshell."
boy dunked through hoop
I'm not sure how many points this one is worth…but it would be a lot more impressive without the trampoline.
man falls off mountain
Well, it sounds like he rolled down the mountain for a while…anyway, he says he's going to Everest regardless.
photos of night look like day
A picture is worth a thousand words…which you need to explain to viewers why you are deceiving them like this.
lebron wishes cavs well
Oh, now he wishes them well, as he send them to their 21st loss in a row?
plane lands on interstate
This is the kind of stuff that happens when your GPS system on your Cessna isn't updated!

2 comments:

  1. Damn, I has hoping you were going to weed the juice today.

    ReplyDelete

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