October 5, 2010 - Europeans Rydin' Dirty

europeans win ryder cup
Short Story: The Europeans won the Ryder Cup, but it had nothing to do with Tiger Woods' recent fall from glory due to intense sexual addiction.
Long Story: Well, this really shouldn't come as a huge surprise, although maybe the way it happened should. I mean, the way I figured it, when the U.S. decided to let Tiger "Trainwreck" Woods head over to Europe with them, (inciting a European terror alert for all female traveler's or husbands traveling with wives or daughters, or even effeminate looking sons) they were pretty much conceding the Cup to the Europeans. However, it turns out that Tiger Woods' divorce truly may have finally freed his mind, as he actually played quite well, only to see his U.S. squad fall just short of retaining the large metal cup it won in 2008 when Graeme McDowell took down the young Yankee Hunter Mahan on the final match of the tournament. So, with that, we send our congratulations to Colin Montgomerie and all the Euros. Your entire continent is better than our single country at golf, for now.

ryder cup

stevmap asks…
Q: Why do we refer to a pair of panties, briefs, knickers, boxers etc when there is obviously only one?
Short A: Probably has something to do with you having a pair of legs, pal! Only unipods require one knicker!
Long A: I don't know, buddy, sometimes things just work out that way. Listen, I am no expert on underwear, but I would imagine that the very simple explanation to your question is that back in the day, people used to occasionally only wear one panty, or one boxer, until one day Benjamin Franklin came along and invented the bifocals, and decided that maybe everything should come in pairs, and sewed together a pair of boxers and a pair of panties, and a pair of briefs, and suddenly everyone decided that they liked keeping that area of their body entirely covered and they felt much warmer, except for George Washington, who refused to wear any undergarments whatsoever, and called that "going commando."
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If you happen to be one of the very select few who plays in the Ryder Cup, I guess you may consider buying and reading this book. If you are one of the even more select couple that captains a Ryder Cup team, then this is a MUST HAVE!