October 19, 2010 - NFL Safety Takes a Hit

violent nfl hits
Short Story: Football is a dangerous game!
Long Story: Well, the good news for NFL players everywhere is that you get compensated quite nicely to play a game. The bad news is that you have a better chance of staying healthy while playing in traffic than you do in your chosen game. As a seemingly large number of players were knocked out of games after helmet-to-helmet collisions this weekend, it appears the league might start cracking down on these kinds of hits with suspensions or fines for the offenders. Of course, to be honest, the only way to truly avoid these kinds of injuries is probably to not play football...or play with guys who don't consider steroids to be a 7th food group.
Trey Parker
October 19, 2010: Trey Parker Day! - This guy basically invented South Park...well, half of it!
WHY?: His real name is Randolph Severn Parker III, which I suppose is a good enough reason to go by "Trey," unless you are planning on never leaving the premises of your local country club. He, of course, is better known as the co-star of the hit movie BASEketball, and, oh yeah, the co-creator of the long-running cartoon series South Park. He attended the University of Colorado as a music major, and his family appears to be the basis for Stan Marsh's family on South Park. He married a Japanese socialite in 2006, and sang karaoke of Neil Diamond songs at his own wedding. Other than that, the guy really hasn't done a whole lot with his life...which sounds about right for one of the posterboys of Generation X slackers.

TOMORROW'S contenders:
Snoop Dogg - Who would have thought back in 1991 with that silly name that hardcore gangter Snoop really would be more popular with little children than adults one day?
John Krasinski - You know, Jim, from The Office? As in, Jim and Pam, or, maybe Jim and Dwight?
Keith Hernandez - Just For Men spokesperson/Jerry Seinfeld's one-time mancrush.

junior seau drives off cliff
Case in point: Junior Seau drove his car off a cliff this weekend. He'll recover a lot faster than Desean Jackson.
finnish news anchor drinks on tv
Are we sure this guy got fired for fake drinking on air? I'd fire him just for freaking me out by looking like that.
singing japanese robot
Speaking of freaking people out…no one does it better than the Japanese and their crazy ideas of what's entertaining.
dunk over seven people
Unfortunately, this would be almost impossible to pull off in a game, and it would still only be worth 2 points.
justin beiber bullying victim
Okay, even if you don't think Justin Bieber is cool, you have to admit he's probably several hundred times cooler than any homophobic laser tag enthusiast.

1 comment:

  1. I heard about the Justin Bieber thing through my 11 and 13 year old brothers. They are severe Bieber-bashers just like I was a Jonathan Taylor Thomas basher when I was their age.

    Trey Parker was a perfect choice. South Park is the best cartoon ever created and Trey Parker is one of my heroes. A hilarious dude.


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