May 21, 2010 - Financial Regulators!

Today's BIG news!
1. senate passes financial regulation
Well, they finally did it. After weeks of talk and as much stalling as the Republicans could physically handle, financial reform finally passed in the Senate, meaning it's now someone else's turn to make sure that we take as long as possible to start regulating those guys that made all that money off the financial meltdown.
2. floyd landis doping scandal
Floyd Landis, former Tour de France champion who was found guilty of doping many years ago, finally admitted that the overwhelming evidence against him was not all just coincidental, and he is trying to bring down cycling legend/probably doper Lance Armstrong in the process. All this is really big news, I'm sure, if you are a big fan of bike racing...or blood doping.
3. intelligence chief steps down
National Intelligence Director Dennis Blair has decided to step down after 16 months of subpar performance, and recent pressure from the White House. The only condition for his resignation was that people still refer to him as the "intelligence chief."
4. paris art thief
Some guy walked into a museum in Paris, picked up 5 paintings worth over an estimated $100 million, and then just walked on out without anyone noticing. The paintings should be available on black market e-Bay by the end of the week.
5. lindsay lohan arrest warrant
An arrest warrant was issued for Lindsay Lohan before one of the troubled star's reps posted $100,000 bond for her. Lohan's attorney said her client was stuck in France because her passport had been stolen...and she was probably recovering from a week-long alcohol, drug and lesbian binge.

Now drop that FRESH knowledge!
1. nba ref throws ball at fan
He didn't really throw it at him, so much as pass it to him, but it turns out that the fan is some sort of big-shot CEO. So, refs, if you are gonna mess with fans, make sure it is with the common folk in the upper sections.
2. oklahoma hail video
If you didn't know any better, you'd think this video was surely the apocalypse caught on tape...however, it's really just another reason not to move to Oklahoma.
3. assault for sandwich
If you find a woman who will make you a sandwich on command, that's great, but if you don't, just learn how to make a sandwich's not worth going to jail for.
4.brett favre nfl return decision
Brett Favre says he will return to the NFL if his alma mater, Southern Mississippi, makes the College World Series again this year. Although when that happens, count on Brett saying, "Okay, best 2 out of 3."
5. glenn beck gold controversy
New York Congressman Anthony Weiner claims that Glenn Beck is conspiring with a gold company to rip off his viewers. Apparently, Beck was not satisfied with just wasting people's time.

1 comment:

  1. I heard that Lindsay Lohan overdosed on lesbian. Is it true?


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