June 17, 2010 - Crouching Tiger, Hidden Phil

us open pebble beach
The US Open golf championship gets underway today, and we have heard surprisingly little about the artist formerly known as Tiger, who once dominated the same tournament at the same venue just 10 years ago. Oh, how things have changed since then, as it appears people even like Phil Mickelson more than Tiger these days.
spain upset by swiss
I don't know if there is officially a jinx that goes along with being the pre-tournament betting favorite in the World Cup, but it appears there may be this year. The Spanish team, widely considered one of the best in the tourney, lost their opening match at the hands of a country that generally specializes in small knives, cheese with holes and hot chocolate.
bp 20 billion compensation fund
It was another busy day in oil spill-land, with BP execs getting drilled in Washington, announcing that they would start an oil spill compensation fund of $20 bil, suspend their dividend, and generally try to make the public think they are good people. However, all that goodwill was essentially lost when a BP chairman referred to all the people hurt by the spill as "small people." Apparently, he was under the impression that everyone that lived in the Gulf Coast area were midgets.
lakers celtics game 7
Lakers. Celtics. NBA Finals. Game 7. What else is there to say. Well, I could tell you that this isn't exactly Larry vs. Magic any more, and this series isn't exactly a matchup of the best Lakers or Celtics squads of all time, but that might ruin tonight's game for you...so I'll just keep quiet.
bin laden hunter mentally ill
So, that long-haired, goofy-looking redneck-type dude that has spent the past 9 years searching the world for Osama bin Laden all on his own may be mentally ill. All you needed to know to figure that out was that he was apprehended carrying the following: a pistol, a sword, night-vision equipment and Christian religious books. Basically, all the ingredients needed for insanity.

police officer punches jaywalker
If you can watch this video, and personally overlook any possible racial issues involved in this incident, then you, my friend, are truly post-racial, or a gigantic liar.
dutch minidress world cup controversy
A bunch of chicks in South Africa have been charged with something called "ambush marketing" for showing up at a World Cup game dressed in orange minidresses to promote a Dutch beer. In America, they would have walked away with a simple charge of "being incredibly awesome."
schools discourage bff's
Yo, cliques are no good, meaning BFF's are so 5 years ago. Schools still encourage LOL and OMG, but keep it to yourself.
cab driver demands tip
What's the better part of this story? The cabbie going to extremes to get a $3 tip, or the lady staying locked in the cab for half an hour refusing to pay that $3 tip. Call me crazy, but I may side with the cabbie in this one.
man killed by bees
If you've seen the movie My Girl then you know how dangerous bees can be. If not, here is your personal reminder.

Buy this version of Tiger Woods PGA Tour golf...because, who knows, next year, it might be Phil Mickelson PGA Tour golf '12.