December 1, 2011 HEADLINES OF THE DAY

Missing girl found at mall

This is the basic premise for various 1980's teen-pop videos, isn't it?

Family says in-flight meal killed flier

I'm pretty sure that's why in-flight meals come with those big disclaimers with a picture of a skull and crossbones

Adopted boys taken from gay father

Father not so gay any more (Not so happy, I mean...)